Bookgasm: 14 Sarcastic Truths We Can All Relate ToWednesday, August 05, 2015
Recently, I have reviewed the book, The Official Dictionary of Sarcasm: A Lexicon For Those of Us Who are Better and Smarter Than the Rest of You by James Napoli, which you can read here. Let me share with you some of the sarcastic remarks I think was funny and which, if not all, most of us can relate to.
Confounding Microsoft spreadsheet application designed by a very cruel person who clearly wants a large percentage of its users to have an embolism.
What you don't realize you are getting until you have to suck in your gut even when you are lying down.
10. The Finger
Something you give to other human beings when you cannot find the right words to say exactly how much their very existence has so deeply impacted your life.
Literally, the ripened ovaries of a seed plant. Gross. No wonder you don't eat as much of it as you should.
A gift given to you last Christmas by people who shrewdly anticipated your needing a doorstop this Christmas.
Astronomer and physicist often called the father of modern science. Although he was condemned and imprisoned by Roman authority for his forward-thinking view of the structure of the universe, he did, many years later, end up as part of a song lyric in Bohemian Rhapsody by Queen, so hopefully that makes up for it.
A word that somewhere in the late twentieth century began to be used as the connective tissue in all spoken sentences, despite the fact that the words on either side of it need nothing to connect them in the first place. Example: the following sentence functions perfectly well without the additional use of the word like. "And he was so, like, unreasonable, and I thought, like, Why are you all up in my face? and then, like, he just walked away." Hence, we prove that like is, like, totally useless.